Head Case
by Jack Mirembe
Summary: She made him promise, both to her and to himself. If nothing else, Beast Boy always keeps his word. Story written for Rabula Tasa's title.


_I own nothing. Many thanks go to RabulaTasa for letting me write the story for his title._

_Please enjoy!_

* * *

'_Baby, you need to fly.'_

'_I-I can't...'_

'_Baby, Gar, please. Listen to me. Oh honey, don't cry. We...you're going to be alright.'_

'_Mama, I'm scared. The storm is so loud...'_

'_Honey, I know, but you need to be brave for me. Okay?'_

'...'_kay, Mama.'_

'_That's my brave boy. Now listen, do you remember the bird we saw yesterday?'_

'_Yeah.'_

'_I want you to think about it. As hard as you can, baby.'_

'_I can't! I can't do it Mama!'_

'_Baby, you can do it. I know you can.'_

'_No, I Can't! Mama, please don't make me, please, please...'_

'_Gar, baby, you have to strong and try for me. You have to promise you'll be brave and try.'_

'...'_kay, Mama. I promise.'_

'_Oh, honey. I love you. Daddy and I love you so much. Never ever forget that.'_

* * *

Gar sat straight up in his bed, tears streaming down his face. Instead of facing the wild storm, his eyes were met with the dark interior of his room. He clenched his fists into his blanket in an attempt to keep them from shaking. The reoccurring dream had set off his fight or flight instinct and left him primed for action. Only to find his greatest threat was from the possibility of his sheets strangling him while he slept.

With a shaky sigh, Gar fell back onto his mattress and started to bring his jangled nerves under control. At least the dream hadn't continued on. The aftermath always broke him. As the panic slowly retreated into the depths of his mind, he noticed the tears hadn't stopped.

He brushed away the tears that didn't want to end and let out a long slow breath. It had been a long time since he had dreamt of his past. Well, that wasn't exactly true. All too often, his sleeping mind would drift back to his days with the Doom Patrol. It was very rare that he dreamed of the days before the Brotherhood Of Evil, spandex uniforms, and training. Back to the days were he hadn't been Beast Boy.

Beast Boy hadn't existed back then. It was the only time when he had just been Gar, no strings attached. That Gar had no worries, so few responsibilities, and a family. The only problem was that part of his mind that contained his oldest memories was locked away from him.

Any memories before the green fever had been burned from his mind. Time had blurred away nearly everything, except for the most horrific incidences. Those only surfaced in his dreams, images that were so vivid and crystal, he should be able to touch them. Only to wake up and have them slip away, like smoke between his fingertips.

Every so often, a scent or sound would weave its way through his mind and strike a chord deep in his mind. It would remind him of warm soft arms and soothing words. The phantom memories of being cared for taunted him with their haziness. While he hated the incompleteness of those feelings, they were addictive. They were a simple kind of proof that once upon a time, he had a family that had loved him.

Of course, that's what his mother had told him._ 'Daddy and I love you so much. Never forget that'._ He wished he could remember his parents. Oh, he knows they were brilliant. He owes his life and powers to their creative treatment of Sakutia. But that's all he knows. He's terrified that's all he'll ever know. He had looked high and low for pictures, but without even having a starting point, the search was slow going. So he liked to imagine details up.

His father was a source of terrified wondering. Gar often lay awake imagining what his dad would think of him. What would run through his mind if he could see Gar now? Would he see a clumsy awkward kid that needed to be trained, just like everyone else? Or would his father be able to look past the flaws and see him? He imagines his father would see him as a son, not a soldier. Sometimes, he thinks his dad would look like him, only not green and short. He liked to think he has his father's eyes. His father had to have been strong, brave, and generally amazing.

Gar liked to picture his mother as being beautiful. That she would have had a pretty laugh and smiled easily. Some nights, he imagined her with dark eyes that could look right to the core of him and tell what he was feeling. She had to have smelled nice. Sometimes his mother could cook and other days the food would burn. Gar sometimes thinks she would maybe be proud of him. At least, he would do his best to make her proud

Every time Gar dreamed of his mother, her words would float through the fog of sleep and manage to remain with him. She had wanted him to try and survive. His mother knew it was going to be dangerous, especially for a child like him. With that simple promise, she had given him a reason to keep going. For his mother, Gar had become Beast Boy and tried to be a hero. He tried again and again to protect to save the innocent, to stop the bad guys, and to simply stay alive so he could try again.

* * *

'_Gar, baby, you have to strong and try for me. You have to promise you'll be brave and try.'_

_She asked him to make a promise, so she could know her baby was safe. The next day, he had woken up covered in mud and leaves. He had walked up and down the riverside, first calling then crying for his parents. It was the first time they never answered. _

_The sun had cast a blood red hue over the tree tops and turned the river into blood as it sank below the horizon. The newly orphaned boy sank to his knees on the river's edge and sobbed. As the first of many tears fell, his mother's last request began to run like a broken record through his head. Years later, he will still grieve for his lost parents only now he cries in the darkness of a Tower on an island far from that river. _

_She made him promise, both to her and to himself. If nothing else, Beast Boy always keeps his word._


End file.
